TSS Ultimate Summary
It’s that time of the year again. Since TSSS is kicking off in a couple of days, I thought it’d be apt to post something related to that delightful organisation.
Now, I’m not an avid theserverside.com reader. Most of the threads are astoundingly tedious and repetitive. So, I thought that it’d be nice if there were some kind of summary, to avoid having to drudge through all that pap. Failing to find such a guide, I felt it my duty to write one. So here you go folks, you never ever need to read TSS again, as below I give you a succint distillation of everything that has ever been said or will be said there.
 Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top  |
|
 |
|
Another innovation…Cedric today pointed out that if you make funny fart noises, some people might laugh. I tried this and amazingly, it worked! What do you guys think? I wonder if we could add some aspects to it and wrap it in a groovyJSythonOP script with some annotations, surely we’d have the killer laugh maker on our hands! |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
HelpfulPosted by:
Dirty Sanchez Sabramajinnahasujawali on February 28, 2005 in response to 2 replies in this thread I use jboss and love it, I work in a fortune 666 company. I like poop. |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
Re: Another innovation…Activefarts makes the best noises, I did a lot of work on it over the weekend and we’ll have a release out soon, it works, and it works now. You should be able to download the code at codehaus, since the whole place is such a quagmire that I’m now able to create crap willy nilly with no one the wiser. This is the power of OSS. |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
NOISY: Personally… |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
On the other hand…Hi sanchez, if you like poop noises, try poopNG, the latest version has some great features that many users have asked for. I’ve rewritten it in php with annotations, a combo which is surprisingly easy, intuitive, refactorable, scalable, and hardon inducing. It required jdk 1.6 betas though but we’re all running that now right? |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
Re: Another innovation…Shut up James, you’re just abusing your position as the active* master pooper. I have to say I think it’s very unfair that you’re able to use your connections and lofty promises and occasional code spurts for financial gain, all the while doing your best to suck OSS penis. Those gluecode bastards, having their cake and eating it, it just makes me sick, sick of the whole cake. |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
Helpful interjectionGuys, actually if you think about it, blah blah blah ;) If you investigate further actually, you will realise that I have nothing to contribute at all, but the thought of leaving a TSS thread without a link to my company’s product causes me to lose sleep at night. Thus, here I am yet again trying to sound sensible and wise with my irreverant pithy comments. Peace, Cameron Purdy, |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply
Post reply |
|
|
|
Re: Another innovation…Well at gluecode we HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH APACHE. I REPEAT, NOTHING. I work for the ASF, but I also work for gluecode. That’s TWO aspects of my personality. They have nothing to do with each other and there is no conflict of interest. Sure, we (in the royal sense) have access to the super expensive TCK’s from Sun, but I (active* underhanded funder) think that I (gluecode honourable employee) am behaving in a sensible and fair manner. I (ASF hat wearer) for one appreciate Sun’s open source stance, even though I (gluecode) have to pay a lot of money for TCK access, and I (gluecode) hire a lot of my (quick ASF hat switcharoo) Geronimo friends just as they (geronimo) hired me for work for them (gluecode) |
|
Mark as noisy
Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
Re: Another innovation…Fuck you geir! Fuck you and the horse you rode in on, you jboss hating thief! You’re a joke, I piss on your code, and Dain, fuck Dain! Fuck you all backstabbers! My AOP impl rules anyway, and now that I’m the officially designated JBoss pottymouth I’m going to do my utmost to tell you all that you’re a bunch of dirty little cocksuckers. The VC’s can stop Marc and the others from talking smack, but nobody pays attention to me, so I can do wtf I want! |
|
Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
Another happy random userHi dirty, we also use JBOSS, we ESPECIALLY appreciate the great FEATURES it has especially in JBOSS 4. We used to use WEBSPHERE and BEA but now we are very HAPPY now that WE have switched to JBOSS. We work in the REAL world!!! BEA is SCARED!!!!! mf |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top
Go to top |
|
|
|
ClarificationBill, you’re an idiot. Shut up and let the adults talk. |
|
Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
|
Another perspectiveActually, all this is possible right now in Spring CVS, and I touch on it briefly in my book. Download it and give it a shot! You certainly don’t need J2EE or anything else! |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy
|
|
|
|
Re: Another perspectiveEJB’s suck anyway, for me Hibernate/Spring is the winning combo, even though the only jobs I seem able to get are ones where EJB’s are heavily used. Why would I ever use EJB3? I hate EJB3! Screw you Sun! All I need is WebWork! WebWork lets me make all the noises I’d ever need. Just file an issue in JIRA and we’ll get to it soon. Have you filed an issue yet? That’s odd, we’ll investigate. Please file an issue. Any thoughts Patrick? |
|
Mark as noisy Mark as noisy Post reply Post reply Go to top Go to top |
|
|
|
The truthIt’s obvious that Sun here is making a powerplay and trying to muscle in on my obscure little business. I have no actual opinions but I will do my utmost to sound like a complete moron. Thanks. .V |
|
See you kids at TSS. Any sessions that you’d particularly like covered or avoided?
February 28th, 2005 at 6:43 pm
Now, I must say this is a brilliant entry ! Congrats Hani, I laughed so much that my body is in pain
February 28th, 2005 at 7:34 pm
Brilliant!
February 28th, 2005 at 8:14 pm
Funny stuff. One of your best.
February 28th, 2005 at 8:48 pm
Have fun at TSSS, Hani. Don’t wander down a dark alley or you might find a knife in your back!
The problem is, could they find a knife with a big-enough handle for all the hands that want to wield it?
February 28th, 2005 at 9:35 pm
LOL!
February 28th, 2005 at 10:39 pm
Hilarious! I would recommend going to _all_ 3 EJB talks.
February 28th, 2005 at 10:55 pm
PREVSPECTIVE:
All this is crappy – and old crappy, pimps.
With pooprevayler you can save your poop WITHOUT a datacrap, and, for your delight, restore it later for your user – but there’s more – if you’re in a really bad day, you can also modify your poop and re-save it as a poop-graph. As the prices for toilet paper dropping you have no excuses for not starting using pooprevayler NOW!
when I learn java, I´ll also learn english
February 28th, 2005 at 11:39 pm
Bile Reloaded. Outrageously Funny!
I love this new format. To stretch this further, you can hijack popular blogs (Raible, Rick etc.,) for future biles.
A common strategy with Indian sitcoms when they become boring is to do a generation leap. You know, the story would move forward by 20yrs. I can see the same thing for Bile with this new format shift.
Way to go, Hani.
March 1st, 2005 at 1:32 am
I want you to keep an eye on my boy. He does not get out much, and when he does others always pick on him. Please be kind to him as when he gets nervous he usually wets himself, and I only packed one pair of underwear a day for him. Thank you.
March 1st, 2005 at 5:56 am
Excellent one !
March 1st, 2005 at 6:36 am
The question is: Is TSS a Middleware ‘/.’ Company? :D
I really don’t when to laugh more: reading TSS posts which tries to be serious or the truth funny posts that /.’s posts. :D
PS: for those who don’t know: /. = slashdot.org
March 1st, 2005 at 8:04 am
Yes! I finally got biled!
Peace,
Cameron Purdy
Tangosol, Inc.
Coherence: Thanks for reading this ad.
March 1st, 2005 at 9:03 am
Most funny was .V. Hey… wtf is .V? Did him change his name like Prince?
March 1st, 2005 at 9:40 am
Best bile ever.
March 1st, 2005 at 9:41 am
“It required jdk 1.6 betas though but we’re all running that now right?”
… brilliant
Well I gotta get back to work, and of course by work I mean writing enterprise apps with nothing but groovy scripts and hibernate mappings. POJ is *so* 2004
March 1st, 2005 at 10:05 am
Thanks for that one Hani. I laughed so hard my dick hit me in the chin and it took hours to regain consciousness.
Where’s clown puncher nowadays? Where’s poomonkey?
March 1st, 2005 at 10:51 am
Now this was funny!
March 1st, 2005 at 11:17 am
That Vic Cockevenik sure is one hell of a fuckwit.
March 1st, 2005 at 12:06 pm
You’re turning into a clown, Hani!!! But this is sure better than your last few entries…
March 1st, 2005 at 1:13 pm
HAHA! Being in that group is much better than being on some silly playing cards! Thanks!
March 1st, 2005 at 3:25 pm
I was affraid that I did not make the list!!!!
woo hoo!
.V
March 1st, 2005 at 3:41 pm
He did it only to make other regular posters jealous!!!! >:(
Brilliant!!
March 1st, 2005 at 5:12 pm
I’ve never laughed so hard while reading a computer screen.
March 1st, 2005 at 5:40 pm
Just an update for Biggus Dickus. Clown Puncher is here but recently got fired last year for reading too much BileBlog. Tried to start a company based on various products used in Hani’s blog but found that most of them suck and finally had to go crawling back to a real job.
March 1st, 2005 at 8:38 pm
Excellent, one of your best yet. I little mild though.
-John-
March 2nd, 2005 at 11:14 am
It just shows the mediocre brains of the Java community that my humble comments were noised out. The ignorance of the Java “computer scientists” ultimately will lead to the failure of TSSS, just like all J2EE projects fail. But do not worry, we all know ignorance is bliss and the average TSSS drone will find plenty of joy in talks about fake microbenchmarks, AOP illusions and sharing misconceptions about .Net and C#.
Regards (KISS my stateless ass)
Rolf Tollerud
March 2nd, 2005 at 12:28 pm
Absolutely brilliant!!!
March 2nd, 2005 at 6:57 pm
I just wanted to say that JSF rocks, oh and by the way I happen to teach a class on that. If you don’t like JSF, and want something else, I am sure I am an expert of that technology and also teach a class on it. Also, I have lost lots of weight and am the envy of my bath house.
March 3rd, 2005 at 7:15 am
Brilliant. Abso-bloody-lutely brilliant.
March 3rd, 2005 at 11:31 am
1+65=66
I like maths challenges…