Comments on: JDJ: Upholding a fine tradition of comical awards

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 16 Mar 2004 21:03:17 +0000

You mispelled ‘Wesphere’.

By: Rampant Clown

Rampant Clown — Tue, 16 Mar 2004 16:22:28 +0000

Why doesn’t Ottinger just go off into a road somewhere and play with the traffic ? Do us all a favour. You know nothing. The Puncher will be calling

By: 12inchDick

12inchDick — Tue, 16 Mar 2004 15:21:27 +0000

i think i’ve mentioned this before, i’d like to hang the Websphere fuckwits by their balls dangling from a rotating ceiling fan and watch with pleasure as their balls fall off. Then to match the pain i’ve suffered using Websphere, I would like to see these fuckwits ram-rodded with a rectangular ruler as long as my 12-inch dick.

By: fred

fred — Tue, 16 Mar 2004 10:52:59 +0000

btw, I don’t know why someone is spoofing me with that last comment about Joe…he’s my bro remember?

By: Joseph Ottinger

Joseph Ottinger — Tue, 16 Mar 2004 09:48:55 +0000

You know, having worked on Websphere fairly extensively over the last few months, I have to say that WAS5 is nowhere near as bad as WAS4 was – and while I still find it to not be as good as its billing would lead you to think, the admin console is fairly comprehensive and – if you have time to wait for it to start up and shut down – it’s actually not half bad.

This is a vast improvement from my feelings on it a year ago. This is why I continually try out products, even if I have no affinity for them – because they might surprise me by actually working decently.

I don’t know that I’d have voted WAS5 for “best java product,” though, not by a long shot.

By: Cameron

Cameron — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 20:06:12 +0000

Hey, Hershey isn’t a bad place to be from .. as long as you’re not “riding the Hershey highway” .. ;)

By: fred

fred — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 18:52:48 +0000

Maybe Joe “blather” Ottinger and Chiara “jibber jabber” can get together for a blind date…

By: fred

fred — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 18:15:43 +0000

There once was a limerist named spiffster,
Whose limericks were foul-odored to sniffster,
With a push of a button
Steaming piles he’d glutton
And post his poor limericks in this dumpster.

gu hah har har har.

By: fred

fred — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 17:22:35 +0000

for once, the comments are funnier than the blog…. ROFLMAO….(oh btw, I’m Joe’s jewish brother).

BTW, are there any sacraficial java cows left for BBQ? Maybe time to jump to the dot NET range and bile them some more…like how I keep getting GD(goshdang)MF viruses and that B/F runtime.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 17:14:13 +0000

I am irreparably flawed. Physically, I am hypoglaucemic, with a metabolism far faster than it should be, requiring constant sustenance. I also have a bilateral cleft…

This joseph ottinger fucktard has been spamming all sorts of places including fuckedcompany.com. Unbelievable that he/she/it has found it’s way to bileblog of all places. What’s really scary is that it’s _not_ a bot apparently since the content of it’s droppings is customized — it mentions J2EE and Java here but not on fuckedcompany.com

I am not sure what’s going on — it may be an elaborate troll or social experiment of some sort.

By: Spiffster

Spiffster — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 14:55:59 +0000

It isn’t Viagra that will give Hani wood,
Instead Chiara’s droning on should.
Hey Chiara, would asking for a blow job be rude?
What did you say!? Chiara’s a dude?

By: chiara

chiara — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 14:50:55 +0000

This letter may seem a bit long, but Java Developers’ Journal’s contentious teachings cannot be adequately described in less than a long essay. To plunge right into it, Java Developers’ Journal can fool some of the people all of the time. It can fool all of the people some of the time. But it can’t fool all of the people all of the time. In the past, when I complained that Java Developers’ Journal was attempting to feed information from sources inside the government to organizations with particularly appalling agendas, I was told that I was just being bloodthirsty. But nowadays, people realize that it has warned us that before you know it, mendacious, callous sideshow barkers will commit all sorts of mortal sins — not to mention an uncountable number of venial ones. If you think about it, you’ll realize that its warning is a self-fulfilling prophecy in the sense that it believes that we should be grateful for the precious freedom to be robbed and kicked in the face by such a noble creature as it. Sorry, but I have to call foul on that one. Java Developers’ Journal is always prating about how it would sooner give up money, fame, power, and happiness than perform a nasty act. (It used to say that everything it says is completely and thoroughly true, but the evidence is too contrary, so it’s given up on that score.)

Many people who follow Java Developers’ Journal’s artifices have come to the erroneous conclusion that Maoism is a be-all, end-all system that should be forcefully imposed upon us. The truth of the matter is that my dream is for tired eyes to open and see clearly, broken spirits to find new energy, and weary arms to find the strength to embrace diversity. Before long, Java Developers’ Journal might be diagnosed with a special type of mental illness that is not yet recognized. But for now, be aware that if it thinks its philippics represent progress, Java Developers’ Journal should rethink its definition of progress. In point of fact, diabolism is not merely an attack on our moral fiber. It is also a politically motivated attack on knowledge.

Java Developers’ Journal’s slaves are not, technically, careless rotters, but rather horny, ghastly pests. I aver that there is a small — yet not entirely insignificant — difference. One might claim that Java Developers’ Journal is deeply involved emotionally in its attack on truth and reality. While that’s true, it does somewhat miss the point. You see, Java Developers’ Journal ignores a breathtaking number of facts, most notably:

Fact: Java Developers’ Journal is intentionally being shameless.
Fact: Java Developers’ Journal’s legates lie about their reinterpretations of historic events, and then, when we’re all convinced that no harm will be done, they suppress all news that portrays Java Developers’ Journal in a bad light.

Fact: Java Developers’ Journal’s prank phone calls constitute an instigation to give voice, in a totally emotional and non-rational way, to Java Developers’ Journal’s deep-rooted love of fanaticism.

In addition, Java Developers’ Journal has been deluding people into believing that things have never been better. Don’t let it delude you, too. Some day, I want to eschew callow Comstockism. But you don’t have to wait for that. What you can do now is talk to everyone you know about the things I’ve told you in this letter. Use every medium available to you. Use the Internet. Use your telephone. Use radio and newspapers. And whatever you do, never be afraid to speak out against the evil that is Java Developers’ Journal.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 14:32:16 +0000

Hani’s bite has gotten weak
Biling powers past their peak
Easy targets now he shoots
Sticking to low-hanging fruits
Slagging off the Reader’s Choice
But speaking with a muted voice
So BileBlog readers, join the cause
And help our Fate correct his flaws
Perhaps Viagra ™ can restore
The vigor heard in days of yore

(click here to contribute via PayPal)

By: Spiffster

Spiffster — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 14:12:36 +0000

JDJ Awards!
Who won the best database?
Not a book, I hope.

By: Spiffster

Spiffster — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 14:07:27 +0000

There once was a channel of vegetables,
Whose rantings were completely non-sensible,
But under their leader of Bile,
and a steaming hot pile,
they’re all now tugging unmentionables.

By: Spiffster

Spiffster — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 14:02:19 +0000

There once was an asshat from #java,
Whose jimmy was colored dark mauva,
With a twist and a shove, and a grunt from above,
The channel screamed, “Give me more, Matha!”

-a Spiffster Limerick(TM)

By: Spiffster

Spiffster — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 13:58:46 +0000

For I am SPIFFSTER!
Hear me ROAR! I’m going to shove
a pineapple up

dammit.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 13:42:47 +0000

Email is fishwrap?
Only if you print it out
Thus, you are a fool.

By: Spiffster

Spiffster — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 13:29:05 +0000

JDJ email
lists of eternal fish wrap
please unsubscribe me

By: Gia

Gia — Mon, 15 Mar 2004 12:51:26 +0000

Is there any java magazine worthy subscribing to?